Closer to fine
by D.B. Rae
Summary: Daniel becomes infected with an alien virus. Could it be a portent of things to come? COMPLETE
1. Closer to fine 1

The gate closed with a quiet swoosh and the SG-1 team stepped carefully down moss covered stones and surveyed the area. The Gate stood high on a neglected stone platform, in the shade of enormous alien Cypress' reaching hundreds of feet into the periwinkle sky. Moss coated everything, including the DHD that sat several feet away half-buried in the fragrant soil. The air was moist and scented with mildew. The damp clung to their skin and made it feel hotter than the 78 the MALP assured them it was. The oxygen rich air caused heads to feel light and floaty. It would take some getting used to. It usually did.

Daniel loved this part. The first steps into a new world ripe with possibilities. The raw beauty of virgin landscapes gave him goose-bumps every time. He felt honored to see something so pure. So untouched. The team made a broad sweep of the area while Daniel stared up at the canopy several hundred feet above his head. He stared, mouth agape, eyes wide with awe. He ran his fingers over the rough bark of a cypress measuring at least twenty feet wide. They walked for nearly ten minutes with no visible change in the landscape. Trees and more trees for as far as the eye could see in the shaded forest. Daniel spared Jack a glance and noticed the scowl. With a shake of his head, Daniel turned his attention back to the beauty of the woods untilthey came to a stream and spread out along it's length.

Daniel watched Sam and Teal'c go off to the left while Jack went off to the right. On his own, Daniel zeroed in on a monstrous cypress with an odd fungus clinging to its side. He stepped over wild berries as large as his palm and wild magnolia. However, he couldn't define or begin to explain the glossy, reflective fungus clinging to the side of the tree.

The sickly yellow substance covered a five by five foot area and didn't appear to affect the tree. Curiosity winning out, Daniel reached out a tentative finger.

"Daniel." The hand snapped back and a guilty flush spread across Daniel's face.

"Don't do that!" Daniel turned to see Jack standing behind him, fingers tapping on his firearm and rocking back on his heels.

"Do what?" The innocent look was hard to pull off yet Jack still gave it a shot.

Daniel didn't buy it and glared at his friend. "Did you want something?"

"We're doing a broader sweep. Stay here and don't touch anything." Jack turned and retreated into the towering wood with Daniel calling after him.

"You know, I'm not five years old! I've been able to take care of myself for years now without assistance. I'm a big boy, Jack."

"I know how old you are. Don't touch anything." Jack raised his hand in a salute and disappeared without looking back.

Daniel stood with hands on hips, staring at the now empty path. With a frustrated stomp, he whirled around toward the tree and mimicked Jack at his yellow reflection. It took only a few seconds, however, before his frustration melted back into curiosity. Leaning forward, bracing his hands on either side of the fungus, Daniel stared at the substance from every angle. Pushing back, he pursed his lips and tossed a quick glance over his shoulder. Holding his breath, he extended his index finger and gently caressed the glossy shell.

And the world exploded.

Daniel watched the shell crack and splinter before his eyes, disintegrating into a dusty cloud. He stumbled back, shutting his eyes against the debris, choking on the dust he inhaled. The log to his left exploded then with a deafening boom and sent him to the ground.

The radio squawked to life with Jack's commanding voice. "Fall back, get to the gate. Daniel, dial out. Copy."

Daniel rolled to his side, nursing his leg, fumbled for the radio as a coughing fit racked his body.

"Daniel! Do you copy?" Through the radio he heard the staccato report of gunfire. Forcing himself to a kneeling position, he found the talk button and rasped out a 'copy'. Bits of dirt and grass flew into the air from behind him and was all the incentive he needed.

Daniel ran through the forest toward the moss covered gate, hoping he outran whatever pursued his teammates. His thoughts centered on getting them all home. Pressure built in his chest until he thought his lungs would burst and was forced to pause against a tree to draw in oxygen. His radio cackled to life once more only no words came through, only the snarls and grunts of something frightening and a broken scream he couldn't identify. The sound had his skin crawling with a cold chill of dread. Someone was hurt. He didn't know who but someone was down. Pushing off the tree, Daniel continued racing through the darkened forest trying to remember the path back to the gate. He cursed himself for becoming too absorbed in the scenery upon arrival. He staggered around trees wider than his kitchen and jumped over some logs and crawled over others. At last he saw the gate looming in the distance.

Sinking to his knees, moisture leaked through his pants where he kneeled yet he ignored the damp. Frantically, he pulled vines and moss from the DHD that sat half submerged in the soft soil. Dirt rained down on him from a crater in front of him, fueling him on. Relief rushed through him at the familiar kawoosh and he sent through his ID. Turning, Daniel saw Teal'c break from the trees , running headlong toward the gate with Sam slung over his shoulder. Fear washed through him as he watched them vanish through the blue pool. Next he saw Jack, running backwards, firing at foes still unseen by Daniel.

With the last of his strength, Daniel ran for the gate then pulled his own weapon to provide cover for Jack. Moments later, they were in the mountain, watching Sam being wheeled away under Janet's protective gaze as Teal'c watched with concern etched on his face.

Daniel braced his hands on his thighs and tried to catch a solid breath. To feel something other than pressure within his lungs. Sensing that Jack was staring at him, Daniel forced words through his mouth. "I'm fine."

"I'm sure you are."Jack used his most condescending tone.

"Good." Daniel should have know that wouldn't be the end.

"Oh. Just so you know." Daniel glared one eye up at Jack from his bent position while Jack paused for effect. "You're ass is bleeding." Jack headed out while Daniel tried, without success, to get a look at his rear. After completing a full circle he decided to let the sudden pain radiating from his right cheek be proof enough. With slow, careful steps, Daniel headed towards the infirmary.

* * *

"Daniel?" Janet tried to convince him to speak. A muffled refusal came from the depths of Daniel's arms where his head was currently hidden. "You're being ridiculous." His head came up then. His face red and his eyes dancing in the sudden light. 

"I can't talk to you like this. It's, it's, it's. It's just not possible. That's what it is." he quickly returned his head to his crossed arms and tried to shut Janet out.

She merely smiled, before returning to the patch of skin exposed through a square of blue cloth. Holding in a chuckle, Janet began stitching Daniel's behind.

* * *

Daniel sat on an inflated donut and tried to recount the events as they happened on P3x-492. It was difficult considering his thoughts were on Sam and fear that she wouldn't wake up from her unconscious state which was now nearing two hours. "And then it exploded into dust." 

"It just exploded. There was no external cause that you could see?" Janet scribbled into a notebook and missed the widening of Daniel's eyes and the dismissive look he tried to adopt.

"Well. Um." he evaded.

"Daniel?" Janet gave him her full attention now.

"I may have touched it." Daniel shifted on the donut and wished for the thousandth time the throbbing would go away.

"This is after the Colonel ordered you not to." It wasn't a question. Janet knew how things were far too well to actually be shocked by this.

"Yeah. But it was a really light touch and I'm not sure I was responsible for it exploding. It all became confusing with the dust and coughing and then the log exploded _without me touching it_, and then Jack was ordering me to dial out." Daniel gestured wildly with his hands and fidgeted with his glasses while his head started to pound.

"Why were you coughing?"

Daniel cringed at Janet's direct question. Of all the things she could have picked up on, she had to zero in on that tiny detail. Engaging evasive maneuvers, Daniel answered her.

"Dust."

"You inhaled the dust!" Janet set her pen down and stared at Daniel who began staring innocently at her.

"It's just dust. I'm fine."

"Daniel."

"Janet."

She rubbed her temples and thought, not for the first time, that Daniel was picking up some of the Colonel's more annoying qualities. "You inhaled particles from an alien substance."

"Sure. When you put it that way." Daniel shrugged off Janet's concerned gaze.

"We're going to have to run some tests." Janet picked the pen back up and began scribbling again so she missed the defeated look creep over Daniel's face. Though she heard it in his voice.

"How long?"

"What?"

"Am I stuck here for?" Daniel pulled at his cuffs and stared at Janet, waiting for his sentence.

"We're going to have to wait and see."

"Great." With a pitiful pout, Daniel hung his head while Janet continued scribbling his life away.

* * *

Daniel stood in the doorway and stared at Sam as she slept. She looked small and fragile while she slept. It was wrong. She'd be the first to tell you that. Only she wasn't saying anything. Her face was one large bruise, several different colors of purple with a hint of black throughout. Her head was wrapped with gauze and blood peaked through from the laceration on her scalp. It was bad. They all knew it. One of two things could happen now. She could wake up, a little worse for wear but okay nonetheless. Or. Well. Best not to think about the or. 

Stepping into the room, Daniel stood next to the chair Jack occupied. It had now been four hours and still nothing. He knew that Jack would continue watching and waiting for as long as it took. It's all he could do but do it he would. "Teal'c said it picked her up with one hand and just tossed her." Daniel hadn't seen the enemy and from what he heard, he was glad.

"How's your ass?" Jack changed the subject with the grace of a gorilla and Daniel accepted it. Jack took the safety of his team seriously. He took Sam's safety seriously.

"It's fine. Although Janet gets this smile on her face whenever she see's me now." A ghost of a smile shadowed Jack's lips before fading into a blank stare. Daniel sighed and left the room.

* * *

They stood outside Sam's room and waited for Janet to emerge.Daniel studied the floor while fidgeting with his thumbnail. He could hear Jack pacing and knew that Teal'c was impatient to know Sam would be fine as well. He knew Teal'c's guilt at failing to protect his friend had had him secluded in his room, in Kelnoreem to ask for forgiveness and seek atonement. Daniel also knew Sam would be quick to ease Teal'c's fears. He only hoped she would be able to. They had been shut out of Sam's room nearly twenty minutes now and had yet to learn anything from the cloistered Janet. 

The door swung open and the three men froze as Janet quietly closed the door behind her. She turned and met there eyes and smiled. "She needs her rest, but she's going to be okay. There's no permanent damage from the swelling and she's alert and aware of her surroundings."

A collective breath was released at the news and Daniel felt as though they had lucked out again. He always worried that one day, they would no longer be a foursome. The danger they dealt with in the course of their job almost guaranteed that one day someone would not come home. He hated thinking it but it was always there. Tickling at the back of his mind. Every time he stepped up to the gate he thought _'was this it?_'. And every time they all made it home he thanked God.

He watched Jack and Teal'c step into Sam's room yet he lingered in the hall for a moment longer. Janet had informed him his tests appeared to be normal but he would be staying overnight anyway, just in case. He really hated just in case. He seemed to get the short end of it all the time. It was never here's an extra hundred dollars for you, just in case. It was always, let's quarantine you for a week or let's take you off active duty or no caffeine, just in case. And here it was again. Daniel pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to will the throbbing in his head and ass to cease.

With a sigh, Daniel pasted on a smile and stepped over the threshold and was proud his smile didn't falter when Sam looked up at him with her battered face and bloody gauze. She was alive. They were still a team. It was enough for now.

It would have to be.

_**To be continued . . .**_


	2. Closer to fine 2

A/N: I know there are two levels of elevators but I totally blanked on that fact while writing and in order to shave another month off before posting this, I left the snafu in. Also, where do these guys park? I assume it's outside of the institution because it would be a security risk to have people drive in and out of the facility all day long. Anyway, that's my take on it. On a personal note, I'm sorry it took so long to get this out but real life intruded in the form of mandatory overtime and illness. Luckily,the finale is nearly comlpete and shouldn't take nearly as long to finish. Thank you all for your patience. I hope it was worth it. _Rae_

Now, on with the story!

* * *

He was going crazy! 

Three days spent cooped up inside the base being poked and prodded from one end to another was about all he could take. He had watched Sam leave five hours ago and since then he'd had to restrain himself from banging his head off the wall. Resultantly, his paperwork was now all up to date, he had dusted, swept, rearranged and organized his bookshelves and he had alphabetized his computer files and current translations.

Seeing his office cleaner then it had ever been, Daniel snapped. Grabbing his jacket, he headed with a determined step to his office door and peeked to see if anyone was coming. The hall was clear, and with only the teeniest ounce of guilt, he quickly made his way down the corridor toward the elevators that would take him to sunshine and fresh air. His heart beat rapidly within his chest, sweat tickled his forehead. He pushed up his glasses with a shaky hand as he glanced around, keeping an eye out for anyone who would try to stop him. He felt jumpy, nervous. That is the only reason he squeaked when Sam suddenly appeared in front of him.

With a hand pressed to his chest, Daniel looked into the twinkling eyes of Major Samantha Carter. He thought it amazing that she could look so joyful with so much discoloration marring her face.

"I thought you left." It wasn't a question. It was an accusation. He tried to recover from his shock. He tried to appear nonchalant. He failed.

"I thought you knew better than to sneak off base while under lock-down?" Sam stared Daniel down with a smirk on her battered face. She was enjoying Daniel's discomfort. She watched as he hugged himself and scuffed the floor with his shoe. He was trying to think up a believable excuse. She saw it in the wrinkle above his eyes and the look of panic that appeared on his face whenever he was caught being less then 100 percent professional. These were moments to cherish. But Sam knew that too soon his boyish guilt would turn into Daniel guilt and those are two entirely separate things so she took pity on him and handed over her offering. She watched his face light up as he grabbed the java from her hand and began to inhale the exotic aroma.

"Thanks Sam." Daniel turned and headed back to his office with a nod telling Sam to follow. Without a thought to his stitches, he flopped into his desk chair with only a slight wince and took a much needed sip of liquid caffeine. He felt better already. He looked up as Sam perched across from him on a stool.

"So."

"So."

"Why aren't you home resting? You should be resting." He took another sip of coffee and felt life stir within him. This is what he needed. A thought suddenly occurred to him. "Does Janet know I have this?"

"You're off caffeine restriction as of twenty minutes ago. I asked Janet before I left." Sam's eyes wandered around the room to the artifacts that covered the walls and shelves. She looked at the pictures and books. She looked everywhere but at Daniel.

"You didn't tell me what you're doing here Sam." Daniel set the coffee down but didn't take his hands off it. He stared at Sam's profile, willing her to look at him. Willing her to say what she obviously needed to say.

"Do you ever wonder, what if?" Her voice sounded so small. So unsure. So unlike Sam.

Daniel leaned back, relinquishing his hold on his coffee and began to fiddle with the frayed fabric of the chair's arms. He cleared his throat. "What if what, Sam?" The room became quiet. The hush of his expectation seemed to throb within his head, making it ache. He knew this conversation was going to change everything and nothing at all. It was a crossroads and Sam had chosen him to share it with. He almost wanted to tell her to leave. Almost. But he suspected there was something he needed to say as well.

After what seemed like forever, Sam looked up across the silence and met his eyes with her own and damned them both.

"What if it's not worth it?" She held his gaze and saw Sha'uri flit across his heart. She knew every battle and every scar played through his mind as it did hers. She saw the pain of loss and fear of defeat reflected from tired eyes that knew too much heartache.

His voice was soft and low when he responded. He looked into her eyes and he absorbed the angry contusions that blackened her face. "I have to believe that it is."

Silence reclaimed its throne while Sam swallowed the lump in her throat and looked away from Daniel. She nodded and left without another word spoken.

Daniel trembled as all the grief of the last few years washed over him. A solitary tear threatened to fall so he picked up his coffee and took a long, hot pull from the cup and felt the bitter liquid burn away the memories, at least, for now.

The sudden jangle of his desk phone split through the quiet and sent a steaming splash of that coffee onto his lap. The gloom forgotten, Daniel jumped up cursing and held the green material away from his skin as he danced around the office in an attempt to reduce the burning. It was useless. He was scalded. In a fit of frustration he picked up the persistent phone and answered more sharply than he'd intended.

"What?"

"Doctor Jackson, is everything all right?" The unmistakable voice of General Hammond shot through the phone with a mixture of shock and concern.

Daniel halted all motion and slapped a hand over his face to smother his headache and make this day go away. Dropping his hand, he saw that all remained the same and decided to answer. " Ah, everything's fine, sir. I've just managed to spill a bit of coffee."

" Well then, I'll cut to the chase. I'm holding Dr. Frasier's medical recommendation."

"Oh." He tried not to sound too eager, as though he weren't chomping at the bit and prancing at the gate. Hammond's soft chuckle alerted him to the possibility he may not have pulled it off.

"Yes, well, I see no point in keeping you in suspense. There seems to be nothing medically wrong with you. Your blood work is clean, and you're free of any virus' and bacteria. In short doctor, you are cleared to go home."

"Really? What about the headaches?" He did not just ask that!

"Those, according to Dr. Frasier, are attributed to stress and you are required to take a long weekend and relax. We don't want to see you around here for at least three days. Is that clear, son?"

"Yes, General. Perfectly." Daniel was practically hopping as he hung up the phone. Tossing his empty cup in the garbage, Daniel gave his damp lap another swipe before turning off his lights and locking his door.

He was free.

He was free.

He was forgetting something.

Daniel stood in the quiet corridor and tried to remember what it was that he thought he forgot. Lights? Check. Door locked? Check. Poking his hands into his coat's pockets he felt his keys scrape his knuckle and the vague sense of alarm faded. Pulling the keys from his pocket, he headed toward the elevator as he twirled them around his index finger. He was suddenly in an excellent mood. It was early afternoon and the whole day awaited him. He stepped up to the elevator and jabbed the up button with his keys dangling from his finger. Twirling them one last time, he caught them in his hand and put them back into his pocket. He was tense and jumpy as he poked the button again. He was beginning to bounce impatiently waiting for the car to reach his floor.

With a ding, the elevator doors finally swung open and Daniel bounded forward as his mind started listing all the things he wanted to do that day. He was going to need to get gas, and coffee. Oh, and he could swing by Barnes and Noble and pick up those books he ordered and oh-

Daniel jumped and spun around when a hand clasped his shoulder from behind. Finding Jack, with an amused 'I caught you' look on his face, Daniel's thought process ceased.

"I was cleared. Janet said I could go." The words escaped his mouth in a panicked rush before his brain remembered they were the truth.

"Really." It didn't sound like a question, but coming from Jack, one never knows.

"Yes. Really." Daniel adopted his defensive posture and put his hands on his hips and broadened his stance. Jacks response had his arms flopping limply to his sides.

"Alright." Jack slid his hands into his jeans' pockets and met Daniel's confused gaze calmly.

"All right." Daniel's confusion became audible.

"Okay." Jack looked down the hall and then back at Daniel's continued confusion.

"Okay." Daniel pushed absently at his glasses and began to chew his bottom lip.

Daniel looked at the floor in confusion as Jack rolled his eyes toward the ceiling, rocking back on his heels. It was an awkward moment all around. It never sat well with them when they agreed.

"So," he drew the word out slowly, "going up?" Daniel poked the ground level as Jack stepped into the elevator.

They stood, silent in the confined space. Daniel watched the lights blink on and off as they passed each floor. He waited while the quiet ate at Jack as it always did. It didn't take long.

"So, got any weekend plans?" Jack asked.

"No. Not really. You?" Daniel spared Jack a quick glance as the doors slid open and the two stepped out onto the main floor. They stepped up to the desk and swiped their ID cards on their way to the door.

"Fishing. You wanna come?" Jack pulled his sun glasses from his inside pocket and fixed Daniel with a shady stare as they stepped from the cool mountain into the comfortable warmth of a Spring afternoon.

"Ah, maybe next time." Daniel readied his keys as he approached his car. Daniel gave a slight wave before sliding behind the wheel. Buckling up, he sighed as he turned over the ignition. He was really free to leave. He had half expected some MP's to come rushing out to escort him back to the medical bay. But no, he was pulling out onto Suffolk Street and heading into town.

He cracked the window and enjoyed the caress of the wind sliding through his hair, bringing the scent of the mountains with it. Squinting into the late afternoon glare, he turned onto Anderson Avenue and blinked away the sting the sun had put in his eyes. Glancing up, he caught site of a black SUV turning onto Anderson a few car lengths back. With a jolt of annoyance, Daniel applied more gas and made a sharp right onto Brenton Street. After a few moments the SUV rounded the bend and with frustration, he pulled into the gas station and slammed on his brakes at the pump. It took only seconds for the SUV to follow suit, pulling up to the other side of the pump.

Daniel hopped out of his car and slammed the door, turning to face the driver of the other vehicle. He watched as the other man slowly stepped out of his truck. Taking off his shades, he casually turned to face Daniel.

"What?" Jack studied the man in front of him. He knew the look well. The fire in his eyes, the throbbing vein in the neck. This was pissy Daniel. He just wondered what caused it.

"What. That's all you have to say?"

Jack looked around and tried to compose a better response. "Nice day, huh?"

"Jack!" Daniel took a few hops before jabbing a finger at him. "You're following me."

"Whoa! Paranoid much?" Jack threw up his hands and took a step in retreat from Daniel's accusation.

"I don't think so. You have no reason to be on this side of town. You live THAT way." Daniel again pointed, this time back toward Anderson Avenue. "Why? Why? Why are you following me? I'm fine."

"Look, Daniel, I'm not following you! I have stuff to get for the weekend, and the shop is downtown. Is that okay with you, or is there a form I need to fill out first?"

Daniel studied Jack's face, finding no trace of a lie, he began to feel embarrassment creep up to heat his cheeks. "N-n-no. That's fine. I'm sorry. I just . . . "

"Hey, no problem. I get it. You were just sprung. Gotta feel like it's still a dream." Jack pulled out his wallet and began searching for his gas card.

"Yeah. I guess." Daniel turned to the pump and fumbled with the nozzle for a moment before settling it into his tank. He spared a glance behind as Jack began filling his tank. He turned his attention to the ball game across the road. A small boy came up to bat and the pitcher began instructing his teammates to move in. Daniel felt the sting of humiliation for the child, and returned the nozzle a bit too forcefully. He turned his back on the taunts of the sandlot game to pay the cashier for his gas.

Jack watched the game with the bitter taste of regret in his mouth. Baseball always brought a crushing wave of sadness with it. That's why he was a hockey man now. As painful as it was, he couldn't look away. He was trapped in a moment of pain. Of loss. It stole his breath and left him defenseless.

The click of the pump saved him. Snapping out of his memories, Jack returned the nozzle and screwed on his cap. He grabbed his receipt and leaned against his truck to compose himself. The crack of a bat had his head whipping up to the sky. He saw a blur of white flying through the air. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Daniel emerge from the store with his head down, counting his change. There was no time to shout a warning. It all happened so fast. Too fast for him to come up with an explanation for what transpired next.

Daniel felt the hair raise up on the back of his neck as he raised his arm to protect himself. The stinging ache filling his right hand had him looking to see what had hurt him. Clenched in his fist was . . .

A baseball.

He stared, without comprehension, at the object resting in his hand. A shadow fell across his vision and he looked up into wide eyes.

"So. What's new, Daniel?"

"I caught a ball." They returned their eyes to the object in Daniel's tight fist. A cool breeze picked up and swept debris along the pavement. The kids across the street began shouting for their ball back.

"I noticed that. I'm thinking we should head back to the base." Jack said, causing Daniel to jerk his eyes up to lock on his friend.

"What! W-why?"

"Daniel! You just caught a ball." Jack pointed it out in case Daniel didn't know what he was holding.

"I know I caught a ball. I just _said_ I caught a ball! What I don't understand is why you think I need to go back to the base?"

"You don't find it odd that you caught a fly ball one-handed without looking?"

"I got lucky. That's all." Daniel squirmed under Jack's direct gaze. His head hurt and the kids were getting louder and his hand stung like a giant bee sting. He wanted to shake it out but he wouldn't with Jack watching.

"No. Daniel. That's not all. We need to get you back to the infirmary so Janet can check you out."

"She's been checking me out for days. There is nothing wrong with me." He clenched the sweaty wad of dollars he had been trying to organize and shoved them roughly into his pocket.

The children's persistent shouts began wearing on his frayed nerves. He didn't want to go back to the infirmary with the needles and cold sheets. He wanted to go home and have a decent cup of coffee and crack open a good book. He wanted peace and quiet. He wanted to be blissfully alone. But he wasn't alone, Jack was giving him that 'you're not going to win' look and those kids were still screaming for their damn ball back making his head throb more than normal.

Pulling back, Daniel swung his arm and let the ball fly, knowing as it slipped from his grasp that it would only reach the curb and his embarrassment would increase to new heights. Sportsman, he was not. But in shock, he watched it fly past the curb, past the chain link fencing of the sandlot, past the eager gloves of so many children, to land with a dusty plop in the parking lot on the opposite side of the baseball diamond. A dozen children stared at him with awe while Jack stared at him with worry. Daniel looked at his empty hand, then across the street and then back at his hand before saying anything.

"Okay, now that was odd."

"Yeah." Jack slapped Daniel on the back while herding him toward the vehicles. They were going back to the mountain.

* * *

They sat in the briefing room and waited in silence for Janet to arrive. They had been at it for nearly fifteen minutes. Sam had been called in earlier and they were all retested with cultures and blood samples and physical assessments. It had eaten up most of the day and now with it nearing eleven o'clock at night, they sat in a quiet room, on a quiet base waiting to hear what he had told everyone from the start. He was fine. 

"I'm sorry I'm late. I wanted to compare a few conflicting results." Janet rushed over to find a seat next to General Hammond and across from Jack. It was a position of power, of authority. It was never a good thing when a doctor needed to take that seat.

"So. What can you tell us, Doctor?" General Hammond gave Janet his full attention as she fiddled with files and charts. She was nervous. Another bad sign.

"Well, actually, Sir. Nothing." She adverted her eyes until Jack spoke. Then she looked directly into his eyes.

"What exactly do you mean by nothing?"

"Just that. Medically, there is nothing wrong with Daniel. All his tests returned clean of any virus or infection. He's not sick. None of you are."

"Why do I get the feeling that's not the end of it?" Daniel slouched in his chair, as far away from her charts as he could get. As if distance could protect him from her findings. He wanted to push away from the table when she pinned him with her eyes.

"Your physical assessment showed extreme deviations from your normal scores."

"What deviations?" Jack sat forward and clasped his hands together.

"Yeah, what deviations?" Daniel echoed, with the first hint of apprehension in his voice.

"You've improved in stamina and increased strength since your last physical, three days ago."

Jack waved his next question to Janet with a flick of his wrist. "When you say improved . . . ?"

"By at least 50 percent." She let her answer hang in the stunned silence as all eyes turned to a straight-faced Daniel.

"I've been working out." He thought he heard crickets in the background and chose to move on quickly. "Right. Do we have any idea why this is happening?"

"Well, the only logical conclusion I can draw is the dust you inhaled on P3X-492."

"And exactly what is it doing to me?"

"As far as I can tell, it's improving your physical endurance only it's not changing your muscular structure at all. I don't actually know what to tell you. There is no possible way for this to be occurring and yet . . . it is."

"Doctor, should we be concerned for Dr. Jackson's safety? Is his health in any danger of deteriorating from this thing?"

"My first guess would be no, General. At least, not anytime soon but I'm hazarding that guess from limited information. Without a better understanding of the substance he inhaled all we can do is monitor his vitals and wait and see. He's already surpassed the incubation period for most known contagions and exhibits no physical symptoms of infection. Other than a persistent headache, he seems to be perfectly healthy."

All eyes turned to General Hammond as he regarded Daniel. "Taking Dr. Frasier's diagnosis into account I see no reason to institute a quarantine. I don't believe we're dealing with a contagion. However, we are dealing with an unknown alien illness, for lack of a better word. Doctor Jackson, I'm ordering you to remain on base until such time as we can assure ourselves of your condition."

"What?" Daniel stood quickly, sending his chair sliding backwards into the wall. "You can't be serious!"

"I'm sorry, son. We need to be sure that you're truly well before we allow you to leave the mountain."

"Just in case, right?" Daniel spat the words out but didn't wait for an answer. Instead he turned his back on his shocked friends and stormed out of the room without waiting to be dismissed.

* * *

"Hey." Jack sauntered into Daniel's office and stared at the cleanliness. "Bored out of your mind, huh?" 

"I'm going to apologize, but not right now. Okay?" Daniel spoke from within his curled arms as he rested his head on his desk.

"It's fine with me." Jack found a new mask on a shelf and picked it up. Sniffing it, he deemed it safe and placed it over his face. Panning the room through tiny eye slots, he searched for a mirror. He caught sight of a bemused Daniel and lowered the mask slowly. "Where'd you get this?"

"On P3X-173. It was a ceremonial mask laid over the faces of fallen warriors as they lay in the sun, waiting for the Gods to retrieve the soul. They often lay for weeks, decaying in the hot sun with only that mask remaining in tact."

Jack gently placed the mask back on the shelf before joining Daniel at his desk. "I suddenly feel the need for a shower." Perching on a stool, Jack gave it a good spin, then settled his gaze on his friend.

"I'm fine."

"Of course, you are." Jack spun again.

"I'm serious. Nothing's wrong." Jack nodded as he continued in another nauseating circle.

"It's just . . ." Jack stopped abruptly and encouraged Daniel to continue.

"It's just, what?"

Daniel heaved a sigh and leaned back in his chair. "The first time it was overnight, just in case. Jack, I ended up stuck here for three days. Now it's indefinite. I'm just so tired of, of, everything!"

"It sucks. But we've all spent our fair share of time in the infirmary."

"I know, and I don't know if it's just that. I've just been, I don't know. Something. I'm feeling something that I can't define. I need something else. But I can't put a name to it. I'm restless, and moody and I feel like there's something more I can be doing. Something more I _should_ be doing."

"Daniel, you give 100 percent to every person we come across, whether they're friendly or shoving a weapon in our face. You've been a liaison between Earth and countless other worlds. Countless other cultures. How can you feel like that's not enough?"

"I don't know. I just do." Daniel shut his eyes to the conversation and allowed it to drop into silence. He allowed that silence to sit there, between them, like an immovable wall. A wall, he just realized, he'd been building for some time.

* * *

Daniel stared at the sight before him with something akin to fright. He wanted to run away, but doctor's orders prohibited it. He just couldn't do it. They were asking too much. Janet was asking too much. For cryin' out loud, he was going to laugh and then he was going to die. Teal'c approached from the far end of the track. Daniel muffled his amusement and turned to face the brick wall behind him. 

He would not laugh.

He would not laugh.

Daniel turned to face Teal'c as he stopped behind him. He was so going to laugh.

"DanielJackson. I am glad you have joined me."

"Yeah. Ah, Teal'c. What's with the outfit?"

"I was told this is the appropriate attire. Is it not a running suit?" Teal'c scanned his outfit, searching for any irregularities.

"Ah, yes. It is a running suit. It's just the color doesn't, ah. What I'm trying to say is it's just so, um, you know? Pink!"

"The retailer suggested that it set-off my skin tone. I deferred to her judgement." An eyebrow arched as a snicker escaped from Daniel's lips.

"So, this retailer was pretty."

"Indeed, she was." Daniel gave Teal'c a brotherly slap on the back.

"We've all been there before. Now, why don't we scare you up a nice pair of sweats, because I can't concentrate on my breathing if I have to hear you swishing next to me."

Several minutes later, humor gone, Daniel jogged next to Teal'c in a repeating circle, that he was told would continue for five miles. Boredom kicked in fiercely and had Daniel regretting the wardrobe change. A swish-swish every now and again might have helped him from passing out due to mental abeyance.

* * *

Daniel squinted into the torture device Janet was using to sear his retinas. 

"Headache?"

"Yeah."

Janet shifted closer until her face was mere inches from his. He could smell her perfume mingled with the mint on her breath. It was a pleasant scent, one he had come to associate with safety and comfort. Even when she was jabbing him with needles and locking him up on base.

She also smoothed his hair back when he lay fevered, tucked in his blankets when he fought the cold, and pushed him to sleep when she saw he needed rest. In short, she cared. So he allowed her to continue to fuss after the MRI and CAT Scan revealed no cause for the headaches, and her medicines failed to ease his pain.

"How was your run with Teal'c?" She clicked off the penlight and rolled her stool over to the tray that held his chart.

"Fine."

"Care to elaborate?" she smirked when he sighed the sigh of the heavily put upon.

"We ran. I kept pace. I was bored."

"No shortness of breath, dizziness or nausea?"

"None of the above." Daniel began swinging his legs and rocking on the gurney.

"Well, I'd like you to remain active for the next few days. Nothing amazing, just enough to help me gauge this things progress."

"Fine."

"Well then, you're free to go. I'll see you at five."

"Yeah. Thanks, Janet." Daniel hopped off the bed and gave a popping stretch before absently scratching at his stitches.

"Daniel, how's your injury?"

"My what?" he said, regarding her with confusion.

"Your, um, injury." she pointed her pen towards his rear and caused a pink flush to steal up Daniel's face and his hand to drop to his side.

"Oh, um, that. It's ah, good. Yeah. Good." he said, inching towards the door.

"I think I should have a look, you could have popped a stitch while running."

"Oh, that's not really necessary. Everything's fine. Yep, just fine."

"Daniel. I insist." she snapped on a pair of gloves and waited for him to comply.

Turning, Daniel undid his pants and allowed them, along with his boxers to pool at his ankles. Thankful for his shirt tails, he crossed his arms and glared at the monitor in front of him. He felt Janet lift his shirt and then the slight pull of the tape as the bandage was removed. Then, he heard Janet's gasp as she pushed at the skin of his right cheek.

"What?" he tried to look over his shoulder but all he could see was Janet's head. "What's wrong?"

"It's healed. There's scar tissue and it's grown over the stitches. I don't know how this is possible." Janet strode to the cabinet and pulled out a medical gown and tossed it to Daniel. "I want you on the table in five minutes. I'll begin as soon as I update General Hammond."

Daniel faced her, holding the gown in front of him. "Shouldn't you update me first? What's going on?"

"Daniel, I don't know. It's some kind of accelerated healing. That is a healed wound. It's not a scab, it's a scar. A damn small scar for the amount of damage I stitched up only four days ago."

"That means?"

"That means, I tell the general and I remove the stitches before infection sets in and then I try to figure out what the hell is going on."

"Sounds like a plan."

* * *

"Danny!" Jack dribbled the ball across the court before passing to a less then excited Daniel. "How's the ass?" 

"Fine, thanks for asking." Daniel rubbed at the fresh wound and cringed at the thought of the glue holding his flesh together.

"Good, then you're up for a little one on one." Jack tightened his knee brace then jogged onto the court. Daniel stared at the ball in his hands before joining Jack.

"You know I'm terrible at this." he said, passing the ball to Jack.

"Yeah, I know. You wanna bet on it?" At Daniel's unamused face, Jack bounced the ball before shooting past Daniel and sinking his first basket. "And that would be point one."

"Oh yeah. This is gonna be fun." Daniel turned to block Jack as he shot past him again to get his second point.

* * *

"Trish, would you get me the first blood sample we took from Dr. Jackson." 

"Yes, Doctor." Janet watched the blonde hurry off before turning her attention back to the charts in front of her.

* * *

"Oh yeah! Take that." Daniel continued on his victory lap while Jack fought to pull air into his lungs. Somewhere, somehow the game had taken an unexpected turn and Daniel had kicked his proverbial ass. It was inconceivable and yet, he watched as Daniel started to hum the theme from 'Rocky' on his third lap around the room. 

"You know, this is a side of you I've never seen. And I must say, it's unseemly."

"Would that be my winning side?"

"How about best two out of three?" He bounced the ball towards Daniel and tried to straighten without groaning aloud.

"Sure. I have time to humiliate you again." he said as he darted around Jack and slam dunked the ball. "How's that?"

"Oh, that's just perfect." Jack said, limping after the suddenly obnoxious Daniel.

* * *

Janet stared at the vial without comprehension. Again, she inserted the needle into the tube and met with the same resistance as before. Putting the needle down, she stormed out of her office and down to the medical bay. Something was horribly wrong, she just needed confirmation.

* * *

Jack felt a small tremor of satisfaction as he stepped in Daniel's path and managed to block his lay-up. He had chased him all over the court to no avail but somehow, he had finally maneuvered himself in front of him. Down 15 to 1, Jack needed to redeem himself, and he needed to do it quickly. His satisfaction, however, was short-lived as Daniel's elbow dug into his collarbone, shoving him to the floor while Daniel continued on his way toward the hoop. 

With a shout of triumph, Daniel made the shot and danced around the sprawled man on the floor.

"Ah, foul." Jack punctuated his claim by lifting his hand in objection.

"No way!"

"Yes way."

"No."

"Yes."

"Jack! I made it in." Daniel stared down at the prone body on the floor and hugged himself.

"You knocked me on my ass. That's a foul."

"You fell."

"What?" Jack sat up to shake out his head. "I'm sorry. I, what?"

"Fell."

"Okay, that's it. What the hell is going on with you?" Jack stood and stared Daniel in the eye. He almost dared him so say it again.

"You're a sore loser. That's what's going on."

"Okay, that's it. You're getting just a little too irritating to be around right now." He said, heading toward the showers. However, Daniel's words had him turning around.

"You're a joke, you know that? It's all fine and dandy to hang out with me when you're the winner, but as soon as I come out on top you retreat. Can't you take it, Jack? Can't you handle me winning something?"

"You need to watch yourself, Daniel."

Daniel met his challenge and stepped up into his face. "Why? What are you going to do?"

They stood there, toe to toe. Neither giving an inch until Daniel scoffed in Jack's face and strolled out of the gymnasium.

* * *

Janet held the tube upside down and prayed for something to happen. Anything. With a jumpy feeling settling into her stomach, she placed the vial next to its three companions. They were all the same. Staring at the vials, Janet tried to come to terms with the facts at hand. Daniel's blood had somehow become impenetrable.

* * *

Jack followed Daniel into the hall. He called out to him but Daniel just quickened his step and continued on. Rushing to catch up, Jack grabbed Daniel's shoulder only to have a fist sail past his face. "Daniel!" 

"Fuck you, Jack!" Daniel swung again, this time hitting his target. Jack fell into the wall as Daniel's fist came again and again. "F'k." Daniel's words became grunts as he continued to pound on him.

Jack threw his arms up, receiving as many blows as he deflected. It was hard to fight back, Daniel's strength outdistanced his own and he was beginning to lose this battle. He didn't know what was going on, but he was afraid of his friend and he didn't like it one bit. Suddenly, Daniel shrieked and stumbled back holding his head.

Jack reached out but reigned in his hands when Daniel steadied himself. "Daniel?"

Daniel's head came up to reveal pale skin speckled with sweat. "J'k?" Daniel cried out again, wobbling as he shot a hand to his temple. Jack reached out in time to catch him and help lower him to a sitting position against the wall. "Daniel, what's going on?"

Daniel lifted his head and tried to tell Jack he was fine. All he heard was a buzzing as two arms supported him while he slipped into darkness.

Jack held Daniel's limp form and shouted for help. Two corporals disappeared around the corner, running for the medical bay. Feeling confident that Janet would soon be on her way, he relaxed and tried to convince himself that all would be okay.

Everything would be fine.

Wouldn't it?

**_To be continued..._**


	3. Closer to fine 3

Jack stood and stared. The window of the observation room affording him a view of Daniel's pale body and his own blackened reflection. The two images overlapping until they merged into one blurred smear before his wet eyes. Wiping the moisture away, Jack leaned his forehead against the glass and tried to block out the nightmare eating away at his heart. 

Daniel lay amidst green linen and a myriad of tubes and wires. His skin looked yellow and waxen, and even from his position, so far away, Jack could see Daniel struggle with each new breath. Janet buzzed around him, checking vitals, changing IV solutions, ect.. All of it busy work. All of it useless. She had been at it now for two days with nothing to show for it. Daniel remained unconscious and they remained in the dark as to how to help him.

All Jack could think was 'he should be in there'. He wanted nothing more than to pull up a chair and sit beside his friend. To offer the comfort of the vigil for Daniel and for himself. The door opened behind him and Carter's blackened reflection took residence beside his own. He didn't acknowledge her, he didn't need to. He merely continued to watch Daniel as though he were the fragile tether holding him here.

* * *

_A shiver ran through him. The cool stone he lay on settling a frozen ache within his bones. Rolling over, Daniel pushed himself up on shaky legs and blinked into the surrounding darkness. The cold biting at his unprotected feet propelling him forward, deeper into the dark._

* * *

Janet stood and worked her lip between her teeth. She needed an answer. She needed to know how to save him. She needed a miracle.

With none forth coming, she checked Daniel's vitals again, fluffed his pillows and turned to exit the tomb Dr. Jackson lay imprisoned in. She needed the brief reprieve that updating General Hammond allowed her. She felt weak and useless each time she fled from his side, but she could only take the emptiness of that room so long.

In her years as a doctor, she had spent many an hour beside a sick patient, busying herself until the revelation hit and a life-saving idea struck. This was different. Daniel was her friend and he wasn't in that room. His body lay forgotten atop the hospital green but he wasn't there. She could feel his absence with each breath that rasped out of his tired lungs.

It hurt her heart, but she knew nothing she did mattered. In this case, and so many cases that occurred on this base, she was useless. All of her medical training went out the window when they came through that pool of light wounded. Everyday was a learning experience and some days, she managed to figure it out. To make sense of it all and pull a miracle from her hat, but this wasn't one of those times.

She felt the hot gaze of Colonel O'Neill and nearly stumbled. She hadn't made eye contact since he took up residence in the observation room two days ago. She couldn't. She was too afraid he'd see the resignation in her eyes. Too afraid of the rage and sorrow it would bring to a man who had lost so much already.

Janet neared the door and reached to remove the mask covering her mouth. A sound from behind had her faltering. Slowly turning, Janet held her breath and approached the droning monitor that signaled the lack of Daniel's heartbeat. Her eyes tracked from the monitor to his still face. Denial screaming through her even as Colonel O'Neill's fists slammed against the window.

* * *

_There was light. So sudden, so bright he let out a cry at the brilliant pain shooting through his unprepared eyes. The cold melted away to gentle warmth and he opened his watery eyes to find himself surrounded in a cocoon of honey-soft light._

* * *

Janet jumped back from Daniel's bed as the monitor continued to announce his death. The scene before her more devastating then the sound piercing her fear. Janet watched as Daniel's skin shimmered and thickened with a glossy wax coating. His IV slowly retracting from his thickening skin until it dangled loosely from the side of the bed.

Shutting off the droning monitor, Janet leaned down over Daniel and tried to find proof of life from within his new prison. No breath, only the slightest rise and fall of his chest proved he still lived. Janet stood up and looked at Colonel O'Neill for the first time. He stood at the entrance of the room, with two SF's restraining him from entering fully. She saw him sag with relief before wiping a hand down his face. He took a moment before jerking loose and fleeing the scene.

* * *

_He stood, absorbing the heat through his chilled skin. His flesh prickled with the change in temperature and a shiver rushed through him. Blinking into the brightness, Daniel tried to look around but darkness licked at the edges of his illuminated bubble. There was nothing to look at but himself. Taking stock, he noticed his glasses were missing as were his shoes and socks. He stood in blue jeans and a black tee shirt. He looked down and saw that the floor glowed brightly through his flesh, detailing his veins and bones. It was disturbing. He looked away._

* * *

Jack stood in the corridor and tried to calm his heart. It beat erratically within his chest, causing his breaths to come out in shallow puffs making him light-headed. Rubbing his temples, he stepped back until he felt the support of the wall behind him and allowed himself to slide down to a squat.

It wasn't happening.

There was no way what just happened could actually have happened. Yeah, sure. He's seen some odd things since the opening of the gate but never had anyone's skin pushed needles out or, or. . . God! He didn't have words to describe it. It was all too horrifying to think about. But think about it he did. Over and over it was replaying in his mind.

The sudden clenching of his stomach as that sound invaded his ears. The quiet cry from Carter as the first shimmer became visible on Daniel's skin. The panic that propelled him from the room with only the single-minded thought of getting to Daniel. He didn't know what he'd do when he got there, only that he had to be there. Had to touch him before- that's as far as he got. Before. He couldn't allow himself to finish that sentence. Couldn't think those final words.

He wouldn't allow himself to think that Daniel was. . .

* * *

_. . .dead._

_At least, that was his current theory. Daniel paced the confines of his sphere of light and rethought the situation. He recalled the events that led up to now, and he cringed at the memory of attacking Jack. He couldn't remember why he was so angry, only that he was. He had vibrated with rage and unleashed it all on Jack. Now, it didn't seem like he'd get the chance to apologize. What, with him being dead and all._

_"You are not dead."_

_Daniel's head whipped around at the unexpected voice. Squinting through the light, into the darkness beyond, he tried to discover the source but found nothing._

_"What are you searching for?"_

_Again, Daniel's head whipped around. This time he found a woman standing before him. She wore khaki's and a loose, white tee shirt. Her skin glowed a deep gold and her sandy hair hung in a heavy ponytail. She appeared young, yet her eyes seemed older. Sadder._

_"Who-"_

_"Who I am is unimportant. I am merely a guide." Her voice held the cultured softness he remembered from his academic days. It vibrated with knowledge and held a resonance of mystique. He felt his recently suppressed curiosity pique and stared at the newcomer with all the avid interest he had once felt in his job._

_"Where are we going?"_

_"Not we. You. The universe is a fragile existence, Daniel. Life and death are separated by choices, thoughts, words. A soul can live or die by their actions and of the actions of those around them. Though a soul may choose their path an accounting must be kept. For existence to continue balance is needed. Sometimes the balance is disrupted and a course changed and the veils fade, and lines are crossed. This is why you are here. The balance must be restored."_

_Daniel stared at the women and allowed a thousand fractured thoughts to race through his head until he felt the correct question fill his mind and tumble passed his lips._

_"Huh?"_

* * *

"I don't know."

They stood inside the observation room and tried to understand what was happening to Daniel. Janet's answer had them all stunned into silence. It didn't take long though for Hammond to breach it with his commanding voice.

"Well, what do you know doctor?"

Janet inhaled a deep breath and turned to block out the scene inside the quarantine bay. She needed to step back and hide behind her professional mask. She needed to detach herself from the case. It's what she did in these instances. These times when she became too close. Too attached. Just one problem. . . it wasn't working. Janet expelled the air from her lungs in a huff and met Hammond's gaze with the truth displayed in the shimmer of her eyes.

"Not a whole lot, Sir." Janet coughed to clear her burning throat and then began her speech. "It appears that a wax coating, approximately one and a half inches thick has grown over Daniel's skin, blocking all attempts to treat him. We're no longer able to monitor his vitals or provide intravenous hydration. As to how and why, I can only speculate. From Daniel's recounting of events, it's very likely the cause of contamination was the airborne spores he inhaled after the fungal growth exploded. Comparing reports of the hostile creatures SG-1 encountered and Daniel's owned increased aggressiveness I believe these spores somehow excelerated the production of adrenaline and testosterone. I was able to scrape enough of Daniel's blood from the first vial we drew to confirm this. The abnormalities didn't appear when I first tested it. It seems as if the mutation continued after the blood was drawn. The only thing that's certain, is that the substance Daniel touched was solid prior to its eruption." Janet held her breath and waited for her words to settle and hit there mark. It didn't take long.

Sam paled and tried hard to remain standing as her head floated somewhere above her neck. The room seemed to tilt and spots of color danced before her eyes. She knew what Janet hadn't said. She knew what Janet had dangled out there for her to catch and confirm for her. She just didn't want to know. But this is what she did. She absorbed data and expelled it in clear, horrifying terms for all to understand. She just wished she didn't feel like a four year old about to discover there was no Santa clause. Her hesitant voice and shaking hands betrayed her years in the military as she dealt the final blow. "J-Janet, are you saying you think Daniel's going to burst?"

Janet met four sets of eyes and took the cowards way again. Giving in to the need, Janet turned away from the fearful faces and looked to the man they all worried over. She'd have to dim the lights when she went back, she thought. The overheads cast a harsh hue over his already sallow skin tone.

**tbc. . . **

A/N: I know this has been a long time coming but I promise you the story is finished. I am just tweaking a few lines and adding a word or two here and there for clarity. The final chapter will be up in a day or two. Thanks so much for sticking with it. Rae


	4. Closer to fine 4

A/N: Here it is folks. The final chapter. It has been so difficult I cannot even tell you. But I love the end result. This is my first ever completed story. Go me! Ihope it was worth the wait.-Rae

* * *

Daniel squinted against the light as the woman circled him slowly, peering into the darkness as though she sought something from within the lonesome twilight. She turned and pinned him with her steady gaze and peered into him with an intensity that told him she sought something from him as well. 

"Do they have any idea the burden you carry?"

Daniel whirled around, looking for a place to lean, or sit. Anything other than this horrible standing that gave him no cover. Nothing to fiddle with. Nothing allowing him to divert his attention. He settled on crossing his arms and staring into the blackness that seemed to have come from within himself. He stilled his heart and let out a long breath. There was so much he couldn't say. So much he wouldn't allow himself to say and yet she pulled it from him with one well aimed question.

"Everyone has a burden." Daniel wondered why that should feel like a betrayal to admit.

Silence echoed after his acceptance of the pain he had, and would continue to endure. It stretched until it reached the woman and chilled her skin with its wretchedness. When she spoke, bitterness broke through her serene surface and laced her whispered words with sorrow. "But yours is so heavy. One man to save millions. Is that a noble sacrifice?"

"It's not a sacrifice." Daniel turned and stared into her tearful eyes and said the one thing he knew to be true. "It's the right thing to do"

* * *

"That can't be it!" 

Jack's entire body emanated barely controlled rage. It was apparent that he wanted to give in to violence. Only the fact that General Hammond was a friend as well as his CO kept Jack's hands at his side.

"I'm sorry, Colonel. I just can't allow it."

"General, Daniel is dying. I think based on the circumstances that it's worth the risk."

"Colonel, need I remind you of the hostile conditions you encountered on your last mission." At Jack's attempt to shrug off the attack, Hammond continued in his 'end of discussion' voice. "Then let me remind you that we don't know what Dr. Jackson came into contact with that caused this. . . this infection. It may have been the DHD, or plant life that he alone encountered. Or, this yellow substance could be a side effect of some other contagion. We just don't know enough, Colonel."

"That's why I propose we return to the planet. Without a sample, General, Janet is just guessing. You can't expect me to sit here and do nothing." The anger seemed to deflate with the statement and Jack quickly ducked his head and squeezed at his eyes.

Hammond allowed silence to settle while Jack pulled himself together. It was a horrible thing, to lose a member of your team. Worse still, when that member is a friend as well. Softening his tone, he continued. "The fact is, we don't know if the rest of SG-1 is infected as well." At Jack's quick look, Hammond rushed on with his words gentle, yet damning. "Dr. Frasier speculates that with Dr. Jackson's allergies this virus may have been accelerated. It could be incubating within your systems, waiting for a trigger to set it off."

"But. . ." Defeat shined for a brief moment then vanished in a flash of renewed anger. "So, what do we do? Wait to see if Daniel dies? If we all get sick, what then? Go one by one?"

"I'm sorry Colonel. My decision is final. Until we know more, the mountain is under quarantine."

With disregard for procedure Jack stormed out of Hammond's office and headed back to Daniel. He couldn't give up. It wasn't in him. He would think of something. It's what they did. It's what they always did. With head down, and lost in thought Jack didn't see the figure standing in his way until he walked right into her.

"Carter, fer cryin' out loud!"

"Teal'c's in there." Her words were soft and were coated with worry.

"It's his room, Carter."

The major stared at the closed door and appeared to be waiting for something. "It's been two days."

"What?"

"I saw him with candles in the hall, he was going to Kelnoreem for Daniel." Carter finally turned her attention to her CO. "And that was two days ago."

* * *

"Are you always so sure of your path?" 

Daniel stared into the darkness and let it fill his thoughts, his body, his soul. A chill snaked from the void to his spine where it settled with a permanence he didn't fear. He wondered briefly what it would feel like to step fully into the cold and slip away. Would his pain and regret disappear or intensify until it was all he was? He didn't want to acknowledge that he questioned the validity of his choices. That every decision he had ever made felt wrong and damning. He didn't want to be here, exposing his culpability in the death of his wife, the catastrophic enemy that awoke because of him and his curiosity. He wanted to hole up behind the wall of isolation that he had slowly built the last two years that allowed him to pretend that they could win and set the world right again. The wall that allowed him to continue believing he had a place in the world, that he could help those in need.

"You've lost so much." She resumed her slow path around the sphere and Daniel. She walked as though she were on a Sunday picnic. Yet with each gentle step she pulled another stone from his barrier.

"Others have lost more."

She heard the anger in his sharp tone and pressed on. "You're not comfortable with empathy."

"I'm not comfortable with pity." Daniel traveled the diameter of his prison as she approached and continued with his perusal of the darkness beyond the light.

"You blame yourself."

"I played a part." The words ripped through his throat and made audible the internal struggle that raged beneath his stiff exterior.

"Yes. You did. However, I suspect you're thinking in an altogether different manner than I."

"You suspect?" Daniel finally faced his tormentor and shot a question of his own. "So you're no longer reading my thoughts?"

"You're very good. Few ever catch on. To answer your question, no. They became too dark. Too sad. You take upon your shoulders the weight of the world and allow no room for human error. I am confused by you. I know from your own thoughts that your decisions to help, to aid have caused you unbearable pain, and yet you continue on the same path. You try to redeem yourself through your actions, yet internally you feel that you are beyond redemption. You are a puzzle, Daniel Jackson."

"I'm really not."

"Many thousands have passed through this place. I have encountered all variety of humanity but none contain the strength of conviction that you hold between what is right and what is wrong. Tell me why you wonder at your worth? Why you struggle to value your breath as much as a stranger's on some foreign world."

"I don't."

"Come now, Daniel. No lies between us. It really is beyond fruitless."

"I-"

Daniel felt his words flee him. Twenty-three languages drained from his mind and left him drowning in an ocean of self-doubt and self-recrimination.

"You are here because you are lost. The balance is no more because you no longer believe in your power to change the world."

She smiled at his look of shock. It was always lovely to look upon a soul as true as this one's. It was a rarity these days, to guide a person who balanced the scales in a positive light. It filled her with a pride she wasn't supposed to feel.

"Daniel, each and every soul has the power to affect change. You have done much to better the lives of those around you. You do not yet know the reach your kindness has. The difference you will make."

* * *

"What difference does it make?" Jack stood toe to toe with Janet and tried to stare her down. He was loosing. He knew he was losing but he wasn't about to back down, not about this. Teal'c was performing a marathon session of meditation with enough candles to power the stargate, Carter was glued to the observation bay window searching for any signs of hope. Hammond had retreated to the base chapel to pray for Daniel's soul and Janet was buzzing around, ineffectual as she might be, she at least had something to do. Everyone had a place to be. Except him. He'd be damned if he stood in the corridor while Daniel... 

"Damn it, Janet! I'll wear all the gear, just let me in there. You already think I'm infected so, what's the harm?"

"It's critical that containment-"

"Screw containment!" Jack cut her off, his anger reaching critical mass. He was ready to explode. His limit had been reached when he was denied a return to the planet. Denied the chance to save Daniel. All he had left was the vigil and he'd be damned if they denied him that.

"Colonel."

"It's, Daniel, for Christ's sake!"

Jack pinned Janet with pleading eyes. He wasn't accustomed to it, pleading. He was a commander. People jumped at his orders, did as he said. He rarely asked for anything, and he never begged. He was begging now. Janet heared it in his wavering voice, saw it in the fear and vulnerability that he wore on his face.

It softened her. It had her wishing this were indeed a nightmare that they could awaken from. But the cruel reality of the situation called to her from within the silence of the room where their friend lay entombed in a silent shroud of misery they couldn't breach. That she couldn't breach. They were all helpless. Daniel was dying and no one had the power to save him. The horror of the inevitable path they were on washed over her in one exhausting wave, wearing her down.

Fatigue and hopelessness clouded her mind. It had been so long since she had been able to rest. To just sit down and not think or worry. She just wanted to be alone, to work through the pain and figure out how to cope with the loss of Daniel. She didn't understand why this was happening. She didn't understand anything. But she was looked to for answers. People wanted hope and miracles from her but she was all out. Colonel O'Neill needed something too but she didn't know what. Maybe he was contaminated too. Maybe there was no point keeping him from Daniel. Maybe after Daniel died she would have to do it all again for Sam and Jack and Teal'c. And maybe then she could succomb to the illness and then she wouldn't have to deal with anything. She could finally rest and maybe, with death, she could finally learn what it's all for.

For now, though, she would have to continue flying blind. She still had work to do, even if it meant whispering platitudes and lying in order to comfort and calm.

"I understand-"

"No. You really don't." Jack snapped the retort and Janet's control over her fatigue and frustration in one stroke.

"Colonel, no one can be exposed to the dust!" Janet slapped a hand over her masked mouth and tried to draw the words back. The stricken face before her had regret and grief rushing through her in sweeping waves.

Jack felt his face pale. Literally felt the blood drain from the surface, leaving his skin cool and clammy in the hushed room. Inevitability set in and he felt, for the first time, the cold fist of death settle around his heart. His team, his family was broken. He never wanted to have this feeling inside of him again. He had lost people in the field. It was the risk they all took when they reported to work every morning but this. . .

This was Daniel.

This was Charlie.

This was his undoing.

"Janet. Please." Jack lowered his voice and spoke his need, his desperation for the first time since Daniel had collapsed. "Please, let me in."

Janet felt sucker punched. Never had she heard such need in his voice. It was unsettling and it broke the last thread holding her resolve together. "Let me call, General Hammond."

* * *

"W-w-what are you saying?" 

"I'm saying, that you are not finished. You have places to be."

Daniel felt a tear threaten at the corner of his eye and he fought it. Turning back to the darkness, he curled his arms about his torso and spoke his thoughts. Spoke so she would know how unworthy he truly was. "I'm tired. Tired of it all. We save two only to lose four. We get ahead then fall behind. We defeat an enemy to have more appear. It. Never. Ends. I just want it to end."

"It will."

Daniel turned and slowly met the woman's eyes. "I don't believe you."

"I know." She smiled a slow smile and reached out a hand to cup his cheek. "I know. But I believe in you. I believe in your truth and your love. You have so many things to do that even to me it seems impossible, but I know more than anyone what you are capable of. I know that your greatest fear is that you are not doing enough. That there is more inside of you to give than what you have already given. You need to believe in yourself. You need to trust your heart if you are to face what's to come."

"I don't... I don't know if I'm ready for this." Daniel felt the strain of the last five years pull at him and nearly broke at the thought of adding to it. How could he possibly have more to give? Yet, how could he walk away? He felt like he was tearing down the middle and somehow drifting away. He was so uncertain. So confused. He didn't know anything anymore. Not even himself.

"I do." Daniel wondered if she were reading his mind or responding to his doubt. Either way, she had faith where as he had none. The woman slowly withdrew her hand from his now, tear-stained cheek to hold it in front of him.

"Just take my hand."

* * *

He wanted to hold his hand. To offer a friendly touch in these final moments. To offer himself the comfort of Daniel, solid within his grasp one more time, even if it wasn't really true. The swish of his protective gown filled the silent room as his breath rasped into the mask covering the bottom half of his face. Jack crossed the room and gripped the railing of Daniel's bed. The cool metal cut through his latex gloves to sink a chill into the muscles of his hands. He hoped it froze them enough to disallow them from reaching out to trace the grotesque cage that imprisoned his friend's spirit. The one rule laid out, by both Dr. Frasier and General Hammond, was 'no touching'. It was cruelly unfair. To be this close and yet be separate seemed unendurable. 

Yet endure it he did. He would be damned if Daniel died alone because he couldn't follow the rules. Jack chuffed a humorless laugh at that thought. They were in this mess because Daniel couldn't follow the rules. Jack had told Daniel the very same thing that Janet had told him not five minutes ago. 'Don't touch anything'.

"Why can't you ever listen to me?" Jack stared down at Daniel's still form without anger. He was too tired to be angry. He was too tired to give a deathbed lecture that would never be heard. He wanted to say something profound. He wanted to say all the things that should be said. All the things he kept to himself for fear of opening up to pain. To heartache. Well, he kept it in and now what? Here he was in the exact situation he had tried to avoid. Somehow, in the last five years, Daniel and Teal'c and Carter, managed to crawl into his being and merge to the point that without one of them he didn't know who he was. They were the reason he fought so hard, cared so much about the fate of the world. They were his home, his friends, his family. And now, he was losing a piece of his life that he wasn't ready to say goodbye to.

* * *

"I'm not ready to say goodbye." Daniel stared down at the hand holding his and squeezed. He knew, just knew that time was short and soon a decision would have to be made. He just didn't know what it was yet. "I feel like I don't know enough. I don't know you." 

"Who I am is unimportant. I am merely a guide." She gave a comforting squeeze to Daniel's hand. "The universe is a fragile existence, Daniel. Life and death are separated by choices, thoughts, words. A soul can live or die by their actions and of the actions of those around them. Though a soul may choose their path an accounting must be kept. For existence to continue balance is needed. Sometimes the balance is disrupted and a course changed and the veils fade, and lines are crossed. I am here to show you your path and to help you face what is to come. I cannot tell you exactly what you must face, or what you must do. I can, however, impart one gift."

Her words, played through his mind as they did when she first said them. However, his earlier confusion and fear were now replaced by understanding and determination. He still felt unsure as to his ability to help but he knew now that whatever came his way, he would do his best. He would do what was right. Daniel's head came up and met her clear eyes with newfound curiosity that brought a smile to her eyes. "Is it a pony?"

"No." she laughed. Close your eyes."

Daniel closed his eyes and felt the world tilt beneath his feet. Startled eyes flew open to meet starry skies. A cool breeze drifted through his hair, bringing along with it the freshness of midnight deserts. He felt cool sand shift under his toes and he was transported thirty years into the past. He knew these dunes and these stars like others knew road signs and house numbers. Tears welled up and over to flow freely down his face.

He was home.

* * *

Jack looked away from the horror in front of him to see the rest of his family staring down from the observation window. Dark circles shadowed Carter's normally bright eyes and Teal'c sat with a somberness that normally eluded the warrior. They knew the final farewell was close at hand. They were united in their loss even though they were separated by a pane of glass. They would do this together as they did everything that came before. As a team. 

Jack turned and caught movement on the bed. It looked like a twitch and Jack stepped closer with his heart in his throat.

* * *

Daniel tilted his head back and let the starlight and sand wash over him. This was his place. Their place. The last place he was able to call home before finding the SGC and in turn, finding Jack and Sam and Teal'c. The last place he felt safe and secure and unafraid. The only thing missing... 

"Daniel."

Everything stopped. The breeze, the gentle roll of clouds across the sparkled night, and his heart. Slowly, Daniel lowered his head and opened his eyes. The woman stood in front of him as always and he thought for a moment that he had just been too caught up in the moment. But then she smiled. A full, down to the soul smile that transformed her face. She stepped forward and stared at him through wet lashes.

"Mom?"

With a sob, she threw her arms around her son and wallowed in the joy of holding a man she had never seen grow up. Daniel clung like a lifeline and breathed in the familiar scent of security, laughter and love. He felt her smooth back his hair and shuddered at the familiarity of the touch. A touch he had ached for for so long. He felt her sigh as she turned to whisper in his ear.

"Baby. It's time to wake up."

* * *

"Sir?" Carter's voice seemed to boom into the silence as Daniel began to shake atop the green linens. The seizure stretched his skin taunt and reddened his face below his yellow mask to create a soft orange hue. Jack moved to restrain Daniel but he dared not touch him for fear of hurting him. Instead, he watched. The scene played on with no one rushing to retrieve Janet. No one cried. No one shouted. No one turned away from the nightmare that encroached on their waking hours. They looked on, in horror, in resolve, as Daniel settled and became still once more. 

Jack focused solely on Daniel, heart pounding in his chest. That couldn't be it. He couldn't be gone. He needed to know, was Daniel still in there? Was he still trapped or had he fled his unholy cell? Without any hesitation, Jack stretched out a lone hand and reached for Daniel's cheek.

Jack reached out and let his fingers feather the waxy layer. It didn't feel like wax though. It felt brittle and gossamer thin. Then, like a lake at thaw, the coating began to splinter and crack.

'This is it. Dear God! This is it.'

Jack's panicked thoughts tumbled through his mind while his heart screamed its denial. They didn't have enough time. They needed more time. But they would never obtain the elusive time they all craved. Before his eyes, the shell continued to crack and separate with the slightest rustling sound until...

POOF!

The cage exploded into a fluorescent cloud that settled quietly around a blinking Daniel.

"Ja-ack. What's going on?" Daniel blew at the powder that danced up from his moving lips and stared with confusion up at Jack.

"Don't move. Don't breath. Don't do anything." Jack's adrenaline shot through his system as he ran for the cabinet and pulled drawers at random. He could hear Carter and Teal'c in the hall arguing with the SF's to gain entrance to the room. He blocked it all in his rush to keep Daniel from breathing any of the dust that danced around him in the air.

"What? What's going on?" Daniel shifted up on his elbow and brushed at the dust coating his face.

"I told you not to move! Are you breathing? I said don't breathe." Jack rushed back to Daniel's side with a wet cloth that he, none too gently, swiped Daniel's yellow face with before shoving a mask over his still-moving mouth.

"J'ck!" Daniel tried to talk through the material that was pressed suffocatingly against his face to no avail.

Janet burst through the door then, with two assistants, fully gowned in latex protective gear. Janet saw Daniel's eyes bug at the site and hid her relief as her assistants took over for Jack and began stripping a fully agitated man. Daniel reached around a muscled arm to yank off his mask. "What is going on? What have I got? Hey!" Daniel pinkened as the sheet covering his body was pulled away, exposing his legs and a large portion of hip to his audience. With strength that was failing, Daniel grabbed the hem of his gown and yanked. "I am not getting naked in front of -!" Daniel was cut off as the mask was firmly replaced.

Janet approached the bed to calm Daniel's fears. "You were exposed to an aggressive virus and we need to decontaminate you before you reinfect yourself."

Through the mask Daniel muffled an 'oh' before settling down. He also shot a look at Jack and Janet that got them moving through the doors to afford him privacy. They remained quiet as they removed their gowns and masks, as though each were afraid a sound would break the spell that had somehow returned Daniel to them. Sharing a look, they turned and stepped through the decontamination chamber and into the crowded hallway that held the worried and anxious family that Daniel called his own. Janet cut straight to the chase and relieved the stress from the hopeful faces that greeted her.

"He's awake, and alert. I don't know what he remembers but we can ask him after decontamination and a full physical work-up." With that she turned down the hall to get away from the people she cared most about, so she could vent her relief in private. Some things were too personal to share. And her weakness when any one of them were injured was one of them. She needed to keep her mirage of strength up so that they could depend on her to take care of them when they needed her. So she stepped into her office, closing the door and shutting the blinds, and sobbed.

"He's really awake?" Carter stared up at her shell-shocked CO and waited with baited breath. She hadn't believed that Daniel could be taken from them. Not really. It just hadn't been possible that they could lose him. He was a part of her family. Brother by choice. She couldn't imagine life without his smile and wit. She couldn't image SG-1 without it's core intact. Yet, she couldn't truly believe he was alright, either. She needed confirmation and for that she turned to Jack.

"Yeah. He sorta cracked and then there he was." Running a hand through his hair, Jack stared at the faces before him. Teal'c stood with eyes bright and direct as though he had never doubted Daniel's ability to pull through. Carter looked about ready to cry so it was no surprise when she launched herself into T's surprised arms and started hopping in happiness. General Hammond thanked God before silently disappearing down a corridor.

Jack stood and felt awkward and displaced now that the danger was so suddenly gone. Yet, was it? He knew this was a close one but one day. . . They couldn't always get lucky. Could they? With purposeful strides, he turned down the hall, leaving the excitement behind him. It took him two and a half minutes to reach Daniel's office. He never thought he'd make it. With the click of the door behind him, he let his legs give out and slid to the floor. He clutched his shaking hands together before dropping his head to his palms andsat there until the tremors stopped and the image of his still, silent friend left his mind.

* * *

**5 Weeks Later. . .**

Jack knocked on Daniel's door as he breezed into the room. "Daniel. I said five minutes, not fifteen."

"I know. I know. I'm sorry. I just can't find a text that I promised. . . ah! Found it." Daniel tilted the thick book in Jack's unimpressed direction before adding it to a tall pile on his table.

"Ya know, somebody is gonna to have to haul those things across the galaxy. Don't 'cha think you could leave one or two behind?" Jack lifted a dull brown cover of a book that had seen better days, as Daniel opened the top of a canvass sack.

"I'm carrying them to the gate room and then another three feet. Voila. Another galaxy. And besides, I promised-"

"Yeah. Yeah. Fine." Jack flopped down into a chair in surrender before picking up a clay fork and eyeing Daniel. "Far be it for me to stand in the way of geeks and their books. What is this anyway?" Jack held up the fork, effectively cutting off any retort that may have come his way.

"That is the traditional instrument used in the disembowlement of condemned traitors amongst the-"

"Never mind." Jack placed the fork back on the table with a look of disgust as he wiped his hands down his pantleg. "Don't you have any nice toys?"

Daniel lifted a book and shook it a Jack.

"We need to get you a less disgusting and snore-inducing hobby."

"Okay, but can we find it after we get back? I'm kinda anxious to talk to-"

"Geez, guys. How long you gonna hold up an expedition?"

Jack and Daniel looked up at Sam with innocent expressions. Daniel tightened the last strap on his pack as Jack swung out of the chair and swaggered towards the door. "Is it an expedition if we've been there before? Because if it is, I'm planning an expedition this week to Best Buy for the new season of 'The Simpsons."

Dual groans brought Jack to a halt as he turned to face his teammates. "I'm beginning to think that my 'SimpsonFest' is not a wildly loved event."

"No, sir. It's loved." Sam turned and discretely elbowed a distracted Daniel who immediately responded.

"Yep. Loved. Wildly."

"Good. Then we're on for Saturday." Jack continued down the hall towards the elevator while Sam and Daniel shared an amused and slightly pained expression.

They followed the winding halls to the elevator that emptied them on the ground floor. Daniel fiddled with his pockets, making sure everything was secured. Sam rechecked her ammunition as Jack rock from heel to toe, tapping on his weapon. The gate came to life with a swirl and a clink and chevron one encoded. Teal'c watched Daniel heft the weighty pack higher up onto his shoulder for the forth time before making an astute comment.

"Do you think it wise, DanielJackson, to entrust such a large quantity of texts to a stranger?"

"Oh, I think it'll be fine, Teal'c. The Kelownan's seem friendly enough and Jonas is eager to learn. I don't see why I should worry."

Teal'c absorbed this answer and bowed to Daniel's judgment. Jack faced straight ahead but he listened to the exchange between Daniel and Carter when she offered to carry his bag through. Jack knew he refused only because of their earlier conversation and found the tiniest bit of sadistic pleasure from it. What satisfied him most, though, was having his team back. The four of them, together, whole, complete. Oh yeah. A nice, safe mission. Indoors. No trees. And his family in one piece. It was gonna be a good day.

**The End**

_"It's not a sacrifice. It's the right thing to do."_ Dr. Daniel Jackson


End file.
